Fashion Friday: Wearing THE CHAPERONE

The Chaperone by natalieeramm featuring floral print handbags

The Chaperone by Laura Moriarty
Riverhead Books, ISBN 978-1594487019
Hardcover $26.95
Publication date June 5, 2012
384 pgs, 3.5 stars
Click here to enter a book giveaway for The Chaperone 

SUMMARY: It’s 1922 and Cora Kaufman Carlisle has agreed to chaperone Louise Brooks (the infamous silent film star) on a trip to New York City where Louise will attend dance classes. Cora’s decision to chaperone may seem a little odd. She’s 36, lives in Kansas, she’s married to a gorgeous man, and has twin boys (i.e. she has everything a woman could wish for), but what few people know is that she’s not the farm girl everyone thinks she is. Cora’s story started in NYC many years ago.

She’s drawn to the city where she was born and where she has a vague memory of a woman holding her as a child. Years ago the nuns at the orphanage put her and others on a westbound ‘orphan train’ (which I had never heard of) to travel the length of the country. People would adopt these orphans for extra labor, but Cora got lucky with the Kaufmans. They wanted a child not a worker bee.

She married Alan Carlisle and essentially lived happily ever after in the eyes of all those looking in. However, all is not as it seems. Her marriage is more of an arrangement than a relationship. She feels like something in her life is missing, and Cora hopes the trip to New York will solve it. Little does she know that she’ll find out more about her past and about herself as a person—and as a woman in a drastically changing period of history—than she ever thought possible.

The Chaperone spans Cora’s entire life time, which is a good long time. Now I like conflict resolution, but when you start resolving EVERY conflict, the story loses its momentum and gets cumbersome. For example, the first 3/4 of the book is action, action, action and then the last bit is just a round up of what all the offspring are doing and historical events (in this case: the crash, women’s suffrage, the Civil Rights Movement, etc.). Usually I just want to skip that bit, like in The Poisonwood Bible. Awesome book, but I didn’t even finish the last section! The Chaperone was beautifully written, but the end drags on a little too long.

That said, Cora undergoes an incredible transformation in the novel (skillfully handled on Moriarty’s part). She is basically a mouthpiece for conservative, male-dominated culture at the beginning of the book and by the end she’s opening up a shelter for unwed, pregnant women. She also sticks it to her uppity lady friends in one scene that puts a big smug grin on my face.

This book tackles a lot of poignant cultural and political issues of the early-mid 20th century including class-ism, racism, sexual double standards, and homosexuality. Funny we still have ALL of these issues. It’s also incredible that Moriarty makes someone as famous as Louise Brooks a main character in the novel, but not the protagonist or even the focal point. Props, Ms. Moriarty! In the end, I think this book is about how it’s never too late to change your life for the better. Cora felt stifled by her stagnant Kansas life and she let her curiosity take her to New York where she discovered herself (and love and liberation). Ok, ok, off to the fun stuff…

FASHION: Though you wish the hemline could be a little longer, this lovely silk dress is perfectly modern, yet still conservative. The color matches the blush in your Midwestern cheeks when you are caught staring at lovers kissing in Grand Central Station.

Slip on those red TOMS that feel like house-shoes. Some people may think they are rather ugly, but for you, comfort comes first! Not to mention, TOMS is a philanthropic company, and you are all about supporting those less fortunate than you whether they are shoe-less children or unwed mothers.

You are a (at a snails pace) becoming a liberated woman. You’ve thrown off your corset after years of body-binding—just like you’ve thrown off unhappiness in your marriage—and this sexy lavender bra has taken its place. It’s perfect for trysts with your secret luuvah.

Your giant bag is great for storing all those secrets you’ve piled up over the years, which will continue to get heavier the older you get. But at least its flowery exterior holds the illusion of propriety!

Pearl studs are your bff. They are simple, elegant, and reserved just like you. Your wedding ring is as beautiful as your husband and just as deceiving.

Keep your unruly curls in check with this messy-up-do, and keep your makeup natural. No rouge for you! Even though your long dormant sexuality is now thriving, you wouldn’t want just ANY man to think he could unwrap your candy.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR: Laura Moriarty earned a degree in social work before returning for her M.A. in Creative Writing at the University of Kansas. She was the recipient of the George Bennett Fellowship for Creative Writing at Phillips Exeter Academy in New Hampshire, and is now a professor of Creative Writing at the University of Kansas. She lives in Lawrence, Kansas, and is at work on her next novel. (See her website for more info).

Other blogs on the tour

Tuesday, May 1st: Sophisticated Dorkiness

Wednesday, May 2nd: bookchickdi

Thursday, May 3rd: From Left to Write

Friday, May 4th: Rayment’s Readings, Rants and Ramblings

Monday, May 7th: Frenzy of Noise

Thursday, May 10th: Bewitched Bookworms

Friday, May 11th: The Well-Read Wife

Monday, May 14th: Fire and Ice

Tuesday, May 15th: Book Journey

Wednesday, May 16th: Babbling About Books and More

Thursday, May 17th: Workaday Reads

Friday, May 18th: An Avid Reader’s Musings

Saturday, May 19th: Midnight Book Girl

Monday, May 21st: Never Too Fond of Books

Tuesday, May 22nd: The Compulsive Reader

Wednesday, May 23rd: Kritters Ramblings

Thursday, May 24th: Literate Housewife

Friday, May 25th: Paperspines

Monday, May 28th: Sassymonkey Reads

Tuesday, May 29th: Picky Girl

Wednesday, May 30th: Chaos is a Friend of Mine

Thursday, May 31st: An Unconventional Librarian

Friday, June 1st: The 3 R’s: Reading, ‘Riting, and Randomness

Date TBD: Verb Vixen

FTC Disclosure: I received a complementary copy of this book for review.

FIfty Shades of Grey

Title: Fifty Shades of Grey
Author: E L James
Publisher: Vintage, 2012
Pages: 528
Rating: 2 stars

This book has been getting mad press lately. By “mad” I mean a crazy lot and also angry press. Lots of people think this kind of novel is porn and shouldn’t be so widely covered in the news and corrupting our youth and housewives or whatever. They have a beef with it.

I also have a beef with it. I love romance novels, ok? I admit it. They are satisfying because of their (usually absurd) conflict and tumultuous journey to a resolution—where the hero and heroine love each other and all is well.

Maybe I haven’t read enough romance, but this book struck me as misogynistic for modern romance. The hero is a psychologically effed up “Dom” who wants to control everything including a virginal girl, who he wants to make his “Sub,” yet she somehow still has all the power. I might believe that if she was even remotely emotionally intelligent. She’s as green as they come, and she won’t let you forget it. Ana is an emotional wreck the entire book and I want to shake her and be like homegirl, GET IT TOGETHER. One second she’s making him mad and basking in her ability to infuriate him and the next she’s like oh crap Christian Grey is fifty shades of pissed off, I’m scared. Plus, what girl in college doesn’t own a cell phone or a computer—can we at least TRY to be believable?

Let’s ignore the fact that Fifty Shades of Grey is completely unrealistic for a very hot second. It’s is an intriguing story that brings to light some dark fantasies, which probably should come with a warning label: Careful trying at home, may actually inflict real pain and psychological damage. By the way, Ana has clearly never watched an episode of SVU. If she had, she’d be running for the hills when Grey buys cable, rope, and duct tape from her hardware store! But whatever. Right? The difference between pain and pleasure is a fine line. Some people are into that Sub, Dom stuff. That’s not what bothered me.

The writing is repetitive, the heroine is annoying, and Christian Grey is very Dexter-serial-killer. I mean, I resoundingly applaud anyone who can write a story that has the country going completely wild. However, I expected so much more from this book! Why? I don’t know.

I found myself constantly rolling my eyes when Grey and Ana EMAIL each other. I shit you not there are fully transcribed emails that will bore you to tears. Pretty sure a Christian Grey would have heard of sexting. Plus, Grey is always like Ana, stop biting your lip *sexually frustrated growl* and he says “Laters baby” like is some clever joke. Puke. It’s terrible. Cut out half of those lines and the book would be reduced to 450 pages. If an even minutely talented editor had hacked away some of excess, I would have been grateful.

So why is this particular book so popular? I can come up with some answers, but they aren’t all that satisfying: 1) in a world where women are becoming increasingly dominant and empowered in many aspects of life, they want to feel what it’s like to be the powerless one (I hate this answer). 2) this is a peak into a sexual relationship that is new and daring—bondage, you don’t see that everyday! 3) snowball effect: everyone’s reading it/talking about it. Can anyone give me a satisfactory answer to the question: Why is this book so popular?!

P.S. y’all should read this funny discussion on Book Riot about Fifty Shades.

Fashion Friday: Wearing SWAMPLANDIA!

Swamplandia! by natalieeramm featuring beauty products

Swamplandia! by Karen Russell
Vintage Books (division of Random House, 2011)
416 pgs, 4 stars

SUMMARY: See my post Swamplandia!

FASHION: You live in a swamp theme park off the coast of Florida with pet alligators. It’s hot. It’s humid. Shorts are a NECESSITY, especially in linen or cotton (a fabric that breathes and dries quickly), otherwise you could very well faint from heat exhaustion. Your shorts match the mucky green-brown of your surroundings. Why not?!

Your t-shirt shows your admiration for the Birdman. It isn’t exactly camouflage (I mean come on, you’re not fooling any birds), but at least you don’t have to wear a vest with stupid-looking plumage sprouting from your back.

Your boots are practical and sturdy for trudging through the swamp searching for your imbecile of a sister. And your striped sweater will keep you warm when the sun goes down. Plus, it’s almost nautical (kinda like Ossie and her boat excursion with her ghost lover).

A braid is a must because, let’s be honest, the humidity isn’t doing much for your hair. AND when you’re running for your life, you’ll need that hair out of your face.

Throw a scarf on top of it all, because you never  know when you’ll need it to scale trees or shade your face from the scorching sun.

THE CHAPERONE book giveaway! Win a signed copy!!

You. Guys. I’m hosting my first book giveaway! Laura Moriarty is going to sign a copy of The Chaperone and it could be yours.

The giveaway will be open from now until May 30th, so you can enter today or any day between now and the 30th. If you’re a winner, you have to send me your personal info by June 1 in order to receive your SIGNED copy :)

The Deets: Unfortunately, I have free wordpress.com and it doesn’t let me insert javascripts *nonsense*  Plus, I’m a total noob. So, just like this post or comment or follow me or something to enter the giveaway! Promise I’ll chose a winner randomly using random.org :)

Clicky, clicky.

Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close

Title: Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close
Author: Jonathan Safran Foer
Publisher: Mariner Books
Pages: 368
Rating: 5 stars

I just finished this book on the bus this morning. It is incredible!

The story is told through a 9-year-old boy’s point of view, and is interspersed with letters from his grandma and grandpa. Oskar Schnell lost his father on September 11, 2001 when the towers went down. It’s over a year later when he finds a clue from his dad in the form of a key. Oskar sets out on a mission to discover what the key could unlock, hoping that he’ll discover something about his dad that will help him understand his death. Along the way he runs into many odd characters and makes a few friends.

The letters from Oskar’s grandma are addressed to him and tell him about her life growing up in Dresden, the bombings, losing her family, marrying Oskar’s grandpa in America. Oskar’s grandpa doesn’t speak. He and Oskar’s grandma grew up together in Dresden. Grandpa was in love with grandma’s sister, Anna. When Anna died during the bombing, he lost his will and ability to live. He and grandma married, but were never in love. When she got pregnant, grandpa left because he was too scared to raise a son. Everyday he writes a letter to his son but doesn’t send any of them. When Oskar’s father dies, his grandpa returns.

Oskar is a great character! He’s very smart and maybe slightly autistic? He is a math wizard and has vast knowledge of science, but he can’t cope with his feelings about his dad’s death and he can’t relate to children his own age. He has violent outbursts, which usually only happen in his head. He is sympathetic because he’s just a lost little kid who loves his dad and can’t figure out how to deal with life without him. But he’s also an impossible character in the way he treats his mom.

It takes a phenomenal writer to write from a child’s perspective convincingly. I might have a soft spot for books written from a child’s POV, but this one is probably the best I’ve ever read. Why am I so bad at writing about books I really love?! Anyway…

Extremely heartbreaking and incredibly written, Extremely Loud is about tragedy, grief, regret, and hope. It is a captivating story that juxtaposes the bombing in Dresden in the 1940s with the September 11 attacks. It compels us to ask the question why do we inflict so much pain on others? Is life now no different from life 60 years ago, and is life now no different from life 60 years from now?

If you’re reading this, grab a tissue. Seriously. It will give you some very heavy boots.

Fashion Friday: Wearing THE CATCHER IN THE RYE

Catcher in the Rye inspired by natalieeramm featuring hats

The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger
Little, Brown and Co., 1951
214 pgs, 5 stars

SUMMARY: The Catcher in the Rye is my favorite book. If you don’t know, now you know reader (yes, that’s a Biggie reference). There are a lot of haters when it comes to Catcher. Tons of people think it’s just angsty-rich-white-boy nonsense. I HEAR you. Holden can be a lot to take. His language is repetitive and he’s a Debby-downer. He’s no hero. He’s not fighting for any cause. He’s not even doing a great job of getting by. But he’s real and funny and sad. Basically, he’s human. He’s not perfect or even trying to be. He’s just young and devastated by the loss of his brother, trying to figure out what life means and what he’s supposed to do with it.

FASHION: That said, you should always wear a “I heart haters” hat  while reading this book. The heart matches the book cover, and let’s face it, Holden is a hater. One of the most notorious haters to be exact. PHONY is plastered all over his inner monologue, which constitutes most of the book. We wear it proud, Holden, because even though you’d probably hate-on us in real life, we love you anyways.

Cloak yourself in that prep school blazer that shows everyone that you’re tragically white. Pull on those yellow pants to match Holden’s (at least partially) yellow character AND the cover, obv; and slip into a pair of flats because you’ll be doing a lot of walking and climbing through windows in NYC. Plus, you’ve go to be prepared to run like the devil when you shout “sleep tight ya morons” to the kids in your dorm.

Line your eyes liberally with black makeup. Show everyone you’ve had it rough. All those sleepless nights getting hit-on by old professors, beat-up by pimps, and drunk off cheap whiskey really take their toll on a kid.

Top off the look with a leather bound journal, because Holden is a boss at writing compositions. Remember the one he wrote about his brother’s baseball mit? Damn near broke my heart.

The Sense of an Ending

Title: The Sense of an Ending
Author: Julian Barnes
Publisher: Knopf, 2011
Pages: 163
Rating: 2 stars

The Sense of an Ending begins with Tony looking back on his prep school years. He and a small group of boys decide to be friends forever, or really all but one decide that. The outlier, Adrian, doesn’t give a whit who he’s friends with because he’s too smart (and maybe slightly autistic?) to need friends. Of course discussions about girls/sex, witty jokes, etc., ensue in true prep-school style, but Adrian is always hovering around the fraternization like an outsider looking in.

Anyway, Tony starts dating this girl and he doesn’t really like her but when she leaves him, she’s “the one who got away.” And he can’t stop thinking about her/hating her. His friendships dissolve as the boys go to different colleges, and after Adrian commits suicide all of the boys lose touch.

Then years later, after he’s amicably divorced and distanced from his old friends, this girl (well, woman…at this point) catches up to him with an incriminating letter and a note from a lawyer. Is this Tony’s chance to “get the girl” and to reconnect or somehow understand his long lost friend Adrian? Not exactly. It’s really about making sense of the ways we try to make sense of our lives.

I get it. Life is weird and it never really takes the path you thought it would. One day you end up middle-aged (or older), divorced, and basically just lost. And you wonder, how on Earth did I get HERE? There is a literal answer: well, you married this person and took that job and screwed it up by doing this. But there isn’t a metaphysical answer, not one that’s satisfying anyway.

Sure, I get it. This is a compelling question in all walks of life, but, English Literature, GIVE IT A BREAK. I mean seriously. People have been asking this question for centuries and haven’t found an answer. Speculating on it in a modern novel (without using any modern techniques or modern technologies) isn’t helping nor is it remotely interesting.

I know this book is supposed to be a literary masterpiece or something. And I hate to hate on two different books, two weeks in a row, but this book was missing something crucial. The writing was lovely, but it was missing true conflict and conflict resolution. It leaves you hanging in the most unsatisfactory way (is this my romance-novel-loving-side talking??).

One thing I liked about this book is that Tony does something that is egregious in the eyes of his “love” when she breaks up with him, but by the time she confronts him about it in middle-age, he’s all but forgotten it. However, she has been stewing over it for years.

So, what I took away from this book: The Sense of an Ending confirms my belief that you MUST be very careful what you say to people or do to people, because you have no idea what sticks with someone and how it will affect their life. *beating moral lesson over head*